— You’re the Asshole (YTA) — Not the Asshole (NTA) — Everyone Sucks Here (ESH) — No Assholes Here (NAH) When my aunt got married, her husband just had a simple conversation with my grandfather — more of like an ‘I am planning on asking your daughter to marry me, and I wanted to let you know, man to man’ kind of thing. Maybe this would be more of a middle ground for you." My brother-in-law took the conversation in the direction of ‘I’m in love with your daughter, and I’d really like your blessing to become a member of this family.’ He even included all of us siblings in the conversation! That angle made for a really sweet moment in which my dad got to tell my BIL that he’s beyond proud to call him his son. It was an incredibly small moment that meant the entire world to all of us. I think that OP could have a similar moment, but making a stand against the tradition is more important — which is really sad. It would be a small compromise that would make his future wife and father-in-law very happy. So, I just think he kinda sucks for failing to see that." This can be a real incompatibility that you two should figured out before you walk down the aisle."
