“Back in my bartender days, I always taught the new servers this trick. If you want your table to stick around for dessert, subtly nod your head yes while you’re asking them if they want dessert. If you need to turn and burn the table, shake your head no when you ask them. It’s absolutely unnerving how effective it is.” —u/GozerDGozerian —u/Natasha_JB “[I] did this all the time working at a pharmacy during COVID. it sorta forces them to be alone with their thoughts for a second, and they usually realize they’re being a jackass. I’ve had people go from yelling at me to ’thank you, I’m sorry, have a great day.’ It’s wild.” —u/lets_get_wavy_duuude “‘Could you repeat that, please?’ People take that extra beat and realize what they’re saying. ‘I don’t understand, can you explain the joke to me?’ works really well with offensive humor.” —u/JanuarySoCold “I do this to my students when I really need them to sit down and just do their work. It sometimes takes me a couple tries depending on the age. I also pull their chair out for them and that usually seems to work.” —u/sillybanana2012 “I have a coworker who annoys the shit out of me by taking up my time talking. I’m a welder and I fit parts for other welders to finish so there are people waiting on me to do my job so any time spent talking slows everyone down. When he starts talking to me while I’m busy, I ask him a question then hand him some trash like an empty soda can or a print or something. Then I start walking back to his work area. When we get there and walk in, as soon as he takes a breath or pauses I say, ‘Oh hey let me throw that out for you,’ take the trash back, and walk out of his area. He never follows and he thinks I’m super helpful and friendly.” —u/One-Permission-1811 Them: It really depends on what your goals are. Me: Don’t you have a beginner’s course? Can you give me a price range? Them: We can work with you to fit your individual needs. Me: Okay, fine. So is it, like, $10 for access to all your courses, or… Them: Oh, no. We have a subscription for $99 a month, it you can buy the beginner’s course for $120. Not useful very often, but it works every time." —u/Ender367 “‘Babe, can you do me the biggest favor ever? Can you turn off the light when you come to bed?’ He would have done it anyway, but now he feels like a hero.” —u/xxnkatxx “The brain doesn’t like cognitive dissonance. So if I do you a favor, Some part of them is likely to say they did the favor because they liked you.” —u/TheWurstOfMe “Yes, also you gave them the gift of being able to feel useful and magnanimous, which humans typically enjoy.” —u/jseego “I’m a teacher and this is how I get my students to go along with completing tasks they don’t necessarily find fun. For example, ‘Okay, it’s home time, we need to clean up the class,’ or ‘We need to complete this section of reading before we can move on to our activity.’ Make it always seem like a team effort.” —u/sillybanana2012 Although be careful not to use this too much…“As a boss, this is dangerous, because while it’s effective in the short-term, people pretty quickly pick up that you say ‘why don’t WE do this’ to mean ‘why don’t YOU do this.’ Better to be straightforward about the project requirements and how much you’re willing to budge on your preferred solution.” —u/goateygoatface —thisismyaccount3125 “The thing is, people do this all the time anyhow. It’s just one of the many ways we communicate information about ourselves to others without realizing we do. This says, ‘I’m in your group/on your side/agree with you.’ It shows solidarity. So if you want to make someone feel comfortable with you and feel like they like you, you just do it purposefully.” —u/GozerDGozerian
—u/allbright1111 “For those who work over the phone it can be incredibly effective as well. I work in insurance claims. I very, very rarely have people get upset with me. Even when giving bad news. To the point I’ve had people who were upset with me and yelled at me call back to apologize. Multiple times. If you mirror their tone from the start, when they start getting angry or upset you can bring them with you. You slow your voice. You drop your volume. If you go with them? They’ll keep getting more and more upset.” —u/Lozzif “I do the same, and also go out of my way to sing the praises of anyone thats helped me. Makes people want to work with you and why not? That’s who I want to work with.” —u/crazyrich “Management 101, always used to use this. If you wanted something done a certain way suggest something very close but not quite right. Let them fill in the gaps and do the ‘oh yeah but maybe like this instead?’ Keep discussing until they land on what you originally wanted, then say, ‘oh that’s a great idea mate can you do it like that for me?’” —u/codemonkeh87 “Also putting your hand out in front of you as if pointing at something — people move.” —u/timothybrooks7 More broadly: “The wording of the questions often influences the answers. For example, to the question ‘how fast were the cars going when they crashed,’ people give, on average, an estimated speed that is faster than when the question is formulated as, ‘how fast were the cars going when they collided.’” —u/lu0n70_confetti Then you say, ‘I’m going to go find out how much it’s going to cost for you to take this car home today.’ Very few protest, and usually it can be done anyway. Then you bring them the paper, tell them the terms, and say, ‘so go ahead and sign right here that if we can make this deal happen you’ll buy this car right now.’ Hold the pen out, nod your head, and don’t say a fucking word until they do. Sometimes they’ll say ‘I can’t afford that.’ Then you just say, ‘what’s the price you could afford? We’ll put it on this paper and you sign right here. If we can make it work, you can drive it home today.’ Hold the pen out, nod your head, and don’t say a fucking word. Once you’ve got them to put the pen to paper, they’ve committed to buying a car. It’s an easy close after that.” —u/SweetCosmicPope “This works, and can be used against them when negotiating! I once had the finance person (the ACTUAL salesperson/closer) give me the runaround on fees, warranty, financing, etc. I told him ‘I agreed to pay $X, and that’s what I’ll pay.’ He fiddled on his computer, tried to say how we’re so close, and we can get there if we change this term or that price. I sat silent for 4 minutes, just staring at him, no response. Got my price and terms, signed the paperwork, and drive out without paying the extra $1700 he wanted to charge.” —BastardofStark
“It depends on what you hand them. Working retail, I’ve learned that if you hand someone something while they are talking, they will take it, put it in their pocket/purse/etc and then have no recollection of you ever giving them something. It has worked on every person I have tried it with.” —u/SkyKitten387 “I used to work at a chain bookstore and part of the job was getting all the books people took off the shelves, took to another part of the store to flip through, and then left, and putting them back in their proper spot. This was a lot of work I didn’t want to do. I would get the pile, go talk to a co-worker, kept eye contact but held out the pile of books to them while talking. Whoever I was talking to took the pile. Every time. I’d walk away before they noticed they had them.” —u/tbcwpg
