Rides (21 Total): • Astro Orbiter • The Barnstormer • Big Thunder Mountain Railroad • Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin • Dumbo the Flying Elephant • Haunted Mansion • It’s a Small World • Jungle Cruise • Mad Tea Party • The Magic Carpets of Aladdin • The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh • Peter Pan’s Flight • Pirates of the Caribbean • Prince Charming Regal Carrousel • Seven Dwarfs Mine Train • Space Mountain • Splash Mountain • Tomorrowland Speedway • Tomorrowland Transit Authority People Mover • Under the Sea ~ Journey of the Little Mermaid • Walt Disney’s Carousel of Progress Here are some of the questions I’ll be asking and answering for each category.
- Wait time/the queue: Is the wait time worth the ride? Is the queue interactive or at least visually entertaining to look at? Does the ride always have a long wait time?
- The visuals: Does the ride feel visually immersive? Was there a lot of thought put behind the ride design, or did it feel like it was put together at the last minute? (You can’t fool us, Imagineers.)
- The story: Does the story feel true to the Disney movie (if it’s based on an IP)? Is the story original, or does it “make sense” as to why it’s happening right now in its universe?
- Thrill factor: Does the attraction make you feel excited/nervous to ride? Would you ride it more than once?
- Mechanics/technology/controls (for certain interactive rides): Are the mechanics of the ride easy to navigate? Do the instructions make sense, and are they easy to follow? Does the ride do exactly what it’s supposed to do, or does a technical upgrade need to occur? However, the ranking will be done completely objectively: I won’t compare the new rides to the old ones and will keep everyone, from families to single riders, in mind. But when you do wait in line, make sure to admire the 18 hand-painted Cinderella scenes that are on top of the carrousel and the 90 individually painted horses. No two horses are the same. Sure, the camels can spit water at you if you’re flying in their “splash zone,” and it might be even more fun to ride at night because there’s no canopy blocking your view from this side of the park, but when compared to the more exciting and interactive rides that Magic Kingdom has to offer, it’s, unfortunately, second to last on this list. The truth is, though, I know this ride isn’t for everyone because it’s more of a show about technology advancement rather than an attraction, even though the Walt Disney Company considers it a “slow ride” because the audience spins around the stage, and the show can be reaaalllyyy boring for some kids (and, honestly, adults) to watch. However, there are a few reasons why I put it in this spot above the other attractions. Essentially, don’t be upset if you miss this ride, but I do recommend going on it at least once if you ever plan on coming back to the park. While the animatronics were a complete upgrade to what park visitors were used to seeing at this time, and it was an attraction a lot of people were waiting for — because, before this, Ariel only had a meet-and-greet experience and a musical-like attraction (which, BTW, was amazing, and I’m so sad they got rid of it at Hollywood Studios) — for some reason, not a lot of visitors wait in line for this ride. It’s usually a 25- to 40-minute wait max. But the minute you see Ariel’s face, it’s really hard not to be pulled out of the ride experience. It’s really similar to when you notice an actor in a TV show or movie just talking to their co-star and blatantly not looking at the road while they drive. I mean…come on now. I mean, can you imagine riding through the “Under the Sea” sequence with the fish dancing around you and not just in front of you? This is such a huge missed opportunity, especially for a ride where you’re meant to feel like you’re underwater.
So, essentially, if the wait is below 20 minutes and you want to ride Dumbo for the first time — go for it! However, if you’re more of a thrill-seeker and want to put your focus on those kinds of rides, then I say skip it. Before you jump on this attraction, it’s important to know that the “race cars” don’t go fast (around 7.5 mph). However, you pretty much have complete control of the car, which means that you can (and most likely will) bump into the race car ahead of you. But that’s kind of the point of this attraction. Just think of it as bumper cars on a race track.
But even though this ride has the potential to make you sick, that doesn’t mean you should nix it completely. Essentially, the faster you turn the wheel and the more people you have in the cup (up to three people can fit), the faster the cup spins. But if you prefer to keep things slow and steady, you can just chill in the teacup and watch as the Dormouse pops his little head from the big tea kettle in the center of the ride. The truth is, while there aren’t many negatives when it comes to this attraction, the thrill factor is low compared to the other rides, and the wait time can be incredibly long and might not be worth the wait when it goes above a certain point (honestly, anything above 50 minutes I would skip). However, if the wait time is around 30 or 40 minutes and you want to ride one more ride right before the park closes (which is a great time to get on this attraction BTW), get on it ASAP to be able to see how visually stimulating this attraction is, because these images don’t do this ride justice. While the theme of this attraction is pretty simplistic (and could honestly use an upgrade) — you’re basically the captain of your own spaceship — it beats both the magic carpet and Dumbo ride out of the park (pun intended) because of its thrill factor alone. Not only that, but this ride is also great to ride twice: once during the day and once at night. Trust me when I say you’ll get two completely different ride experiences. (TBH, I prefer going at night, but that’s just because you can see everything lit up in the park.) Yes, you can see Goofy’s outline in certain parts of the ride, but it’s missing the magic that the Slinky Dog (from Hollywood Studios) and the Incredicoaster (from California Adventure) have with either flashing lights or character markers that clue into the overall story of the ride. The one positive thing about this? When you ride this attraction at night, you can expect even more intensity similar to Space Mountain because you’ll barely be able to see anything in front of your face for the majority of the ride. And finally, just like the queue, you can tell the Imagineers put a lot of thought and care into this ride because not only does the story feel cohesive, but the overall composition of the interior of the ride feels completely immersive (so much so that you want to jump out of the boat and explore). Just be mindful that you might get a little wet (especially your bottoms) and that the wait time can lean on the longer side, especially if it’s extremely hot or rainy outside. When this attraction first opened in 1998, it was all the rage and the technology/mechanics of this ride were something visitors had never seen before. However, now that advanced technology has been created for newer rides such as Toy Story Mania at Hollywood Studios, it’s hard not to feel less enthusiastic about this ride — but let me try to convince you otherwise. The minute you enter the building, you’ll be met with eye-catching cartoon wall art that replicates a command center. Look up front, and you’ll find a full-scale Buzz Lightyear who is giving instructions via a View-Master toy. Yes, his face is a little funny looking, but don’t mind Buzz, because that’s only one part of the ride. The other negative? The vehicles only hold two people at once, which can make it hard to compete with others who may be a part of your group. Other than that, this is a ride I guarantee you’ll have a blast on, no matter what age you are. Other than that, this is a must-ride for the whole family, so close your eyes and enjoy the breeze as you relax on a Disney World ride of tomorrow. Of course, this attraction is outdated and problematic with the story and theme (and luckily, it’s being updated with scenes from Disney’s Princess and the Frog). But since this new attraction won’t open until 2024, I’m putting this slightly lower on the list because there’s currently just no real connection to these characters and the story — and we don’t have time for that. Also, it’s one of the few (if only) attractions where you get a free Ziploc souvenir to keep your phone from getting soaked. So it’s a win-win, if you were to ask me. But while there are a few things that will blow you away about this ride, I wish some things were different or even better. The other part I wish they would expand on is the story itself. I love how it’s solely focused on the mining part of the movie (which, honestly, makes the most sense), but it feels like a huge missed opportunity not to incorporate more of the characters or to simply have more of the coaster be incorporated indoors (it’s a MINE RIDE after all). Even though this might be considered a kiddie ride to some, I highly suggest getting on this attraction the minute the park opens because the wait time is usually one of the highest (if not the highest) in the entire park — but don’t worry, it’s really worth it. But even though you may have to wait 75 minutes plus for this attraction now (I know), it’s still worth the wait. During this journey, you can expect to be educated about the many continents, rivers, and animals you’ll come across as well as hear the corniest but funniest jokes ever. And even when you think you can only ride this attraction once because the jokes will always be the same, the skippers are known to ad-lib and change between jokes depending on the day — so you’re essentially never getting the same ride twice. Even though there could be some animatronic and visual upgrades, the lack of technological advancement won’t deter from the main focus of the ride: the skippers’ senses of humor. But the thing that makes the Haunted Mansion ride one of the best (if not the best) slow rides at Disney is its story and theme. A haunted mansion that invites you to be the thousandth ghost that somehow mixes horror with a musical theme all in one? You honestly can’t beat that. Even the Cast Members are in on the story as they lead you into the mansion with a frown on their face. Either way, you’ll want to ride this ride over and over again — and that’s why it’s in the number one spot.
